Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy: review

Drive Me Crazy at a glance — what you get

Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand is a double-sided wand made of borosilicate glass without a motor, battery, or electronics. One end is a simple, semi-realistic club, and the other is a thicker double ball, with a slightly curved shaft between them featuring six protruding glass nubs. The manufacturer states a total length of 19,1 centimeters, an insertable length of 16,5 centimeters, and a circumference of 11,4 centimeters. A satin storage pouch is included. SexToys.co.uk sells the item at 39.45 GBP and it is in stock; price checked 26 September 2026.

So this is not a product with a feature list. There is no charging time to report, no run time, no sound level, and no programs. What can be assessed is the material, dimensions, shape, documentation, and price — and that’s exactly why each individual specification line matters more than it would have on a vibrator, where a weak material choice can be hidden behind fourteen intensity steps.

The review is exclusively about the item with EAN 5060108819718, the manufacturer’s item number FS-40175. The check against the barcode register provides the product name Fifty Shades Of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand, and the same item number is listed by the source listings. It’s the same product across the stores, which is worth stating up front—the Fifty Shades of Grey range includes several glass products with similar-sounding names.

What Drive Me Crazy is, and who actually manufactures it

In this context, Fifty Shades of Grey is a licensed trademark, not a factory. The products are sold as The Official Pleasure Collection and are described as approved by the author E L James, but the company listed as the manufacturer in the product data is Lovehoney LTD. The country of manufacture is stated as China. The model has been on the market for a long time: the manufacturer’s listing indicates that the item has been available since 22 November 2012, which makes Drive Me Crazy one of the oldest products that is still sold.

Knowing who the manufacturer is matters for two reasons. The first is that the specification should be traceable to someone who is responsible for it, and here the chain is clear: the manufacturer’s own product text states the dimensions, the material, and the contents of the packaging, and the shops publish translations of the same text. The second reason is the warranty issue, and there the picture is thinner — which we’ll get back to further down.

It’s also worth noting what Drive Me Crazy is not. Two of the four shops describe the product as "the well-structured vibrator" in their running text. That’s a pure translation mistake. The wand is made of solid glass, it has no motor, and it can’t vibrate. Nowhere in the manufacturer’s own product text does the word vibrator appear.

Dimensions: 19.1 cm total, 16.5 cm insertable — and a diameter that the shops don’t agree on

Length is the data point where all sources, in practice, say the same thing. The manufacturer states a total length of 19.1 centimeters. Two of the four stores repeat 19.1 centimeters, while the other two round it to 19 centimeters. Insertable length is stated as 16.5 centimeters by all four stores and by the manufacturer. That means that a bit more than two and a half centimeters of the wand is intended to stay outside the body and serve as a grip.

The thickness is another matter, and here the details diverge in a way that’s worth pausing to look at. The manufacturer does not publish any diameter at all — only the circumference, 11.4 centimeters. One store lists the same circumference, 11.4 centimeters, and no diameter. Another store lists the circumference as 11.5 centimeters and the diameter as 3.5 centimeters in its quick facts box, but at the same time it writes Ø 3–3.5 centimeters in the main description. Two stores list the diameter as 3 centimeters.

What can be confirmed is that the three pieces of information cannot all be true at the same time. A circumference of 11.4 centimeters corresponds to a diameter of about 3.6 centimeters, because the diameter is the circumference divided by pi. One listing’s 3.5 centimeters is close to that figure. Other listings’ 3 centimeters do not— a circle with a diameter of 3 centimeters has a circumference of just under 9.5 centimeters, i.e. two centimeters less than what the manufacturer itself states. Therefore, expect just over three and a half centimeters at the thickest point, not three.

Weight is the missing piece of information entirely. The manufacturer does not publish any product weight for Drive Me Crazy, and none of the product listings does either. The product data includes two weight figures—226.8 grams in the shipping section and 0.3 kilograms in the technical summary—but they are different sizes, neither of them is labeled as the product’s weight, and the first one corresponds exactly to eight ounces, which is a typical rounded “colli value” rather than a weighed result. Expect that a massive glass rod of this size is noticeably heavier in the hand than a silicone dildo with the same measurements, but treat both figures as shipping figures until the manufacturer specifies them.

The packaging is listed as 15.24 × 20.32 × 5.08 centimeters. Those measurements are also rounded inch values—six, eight, and two inches—which is typical of how older article data from the English-language market looks.

The shape: two ends, six nubs, and a bent shaft

The construction is the entire product idea. The manufacturer describes one end as a simple club with a semi-realistic shape, and the other as a double ball with a rounder and slightly thicker curve. Between them sit six glass nubs along the shaft. The shaft has a slight upward bend, which, according to the manufacturer, is intended for G-point massage.

In practice, that means you have two different products in the same rod. The narrower end with the single club gives a more traditional shape, while the double ball at the other end provides two distinct pressure points one after the other. Which end fits best cannot be determined on paper—but what can be established is that a double-sided rod made of a material that cannot be bent places higher demands on the angle you hold it at than a flexible product does.

An explanation about the surface belongs here, because the manufacturer’s and a store’s information conflict. The manufacturer states six glass nubs along the shaft, and Joylands’s own product description and bullet list talk about a nubbed, structured surface. However, the same store’s specification table lists the surface as “smooth”. It’s an internal contradiction on the same page, not two different product variants. The manufacturer’s information applies: the shaft is nubbed, while the two end caps are smooth.

The base also deserves a mention. The outer ball at the double-ball end is marked with the brand name engraved into the glass. It’s a detail that doesn’t affect functionality, but one of the six customer reviews mentions it as an aesthetic objection — a reminder that a product made of transparent glass has nowhere to hide things like that.

Material: borosilicate glass and what it actually means

The material question is the only property of an intimate product that can’t be compensated for with experience or care, and it determines whether the product is still hygienic after ten years. The manufacturer states the material as glass and specifies it in the running text as strong and tough borosilicate glass. In this market, the product is sold by SexToys.co.uk at 39.45 GBP and is in stock; price checked 26 September 2026.

Why non-porous material is the whole point

Glass is a non-porous material. That means the surface lacks the microscopic cavities where body fluids, lubricants, and bacteria can remain after cleaning. A non-porous surface can be cleaned completely, not just superficially, and it’s the single most important property of a material that’s meant to lie against the mucous membrane. Pipedream, the manufacturer of the competing Icicles series, describes glass in its own product data as hypoallergenic, non-porous, and body-safe — the same three properties that make the material interesting here.

The difference compared to soft materials is fundamental and not a matter of degree. Silicone is also non-porous and works very well, but silicone ages: the surface can become sticky, it takes in odors over time, and it breaks down with the wrong type of lubricant. Glass doesn’t age at all. There is no plasticizer system that can migrate out of the material, no surface that can become porous, and no chemical process that makes the shaft worse after five years than it was on the first day. That’s why, in practice, a glass rod has no best-before date.

The opposite is materials like soft PVC, often sold as jelly, and undeclared TPE. The material designation says nothing about what additives are included; as a rule, the surface isn’t non-porous, and therefore the product can’t be cleaned completely. That Drive Me Crazy is glass all the way through makes the whole discussion irrelevant for this product.

What borosilicate glass is — and what the manufacturer doesn’t state about it

Borosilicate glass is the type of glass used for laboratory glassware and oven dishes. It contains boron oxide, which gives the material a lower thermal expansion than ordinary lime-soda glass and thereby better resistance to temperature differences. It is precisely this property that makes the material interesting in a product marketed for temperature play.

However, that is where the disclosed information ends. Neither the manufacturer states which borosilicate quality it is, any coefficient of thermal expansion, any maximum working temperature, or any maximum permitted temperature difference. There is therefore no published figure that you can calculate from when you decide how hot the water the wand can tolerate. It is a real gap in the documentation, and it is the reason the temperature section further down is based on another manufacturer’s written instructions instead of Lovehoneys.

The claim that the wand is hand-blown is not stated in the manufacturer’s own text. It is plausible for this type of product, but it should be read as a store statement. Hand-blown glass in practice means that each specimen can vary slightly in appearance, and that the shape is not machine-identical between two wands.

Phthalates and latex — what the material declaration says

The manufacturer explicitly states that the product contains neither latex nor phthalates. Several retailer listings repeat these statements, with one describing it as phthalate-free and another as body-safe and free from phthalates. That is unusually unambiguous for a product in this price range.

Phthalates are a group of plasticizers used to make plastic — especially flexible PVC — pliable. Kemikalieinspektionen describes them as substances that can affect the hormone system and make reproduction more difficult, and several of them are therefore restricted or banned within the EU in a large number of products. This product category is repeatedly the subject of supervision precisely because it contains plasticized plastic against the skin and mucous membranes.

What makes the declaration easy to trust here is the material itself. Glass does not require plasticizers to function. A hard, inorganic material has no reason to contain phthalates, unlike soft plastic where the softness comes exactly from the additives. Phthalate-free on a glass product is therefore not a promise you need to take on faith — it follows from the choice of material. The same applies to the latex claim, which is relevant for someone who is allergic to latex and gets reactions faster on mucous membranes than on ordinary skin.

Glass vs. silicone: what difference it makes in practice

Both materials are non-porous and both can be cleaned completely. Four differences matter when you choose.

• Stiffness. The manufacturer specifies the flexibility as Rigid, and one retailer describes the elasticity as not bendable. The glass doesn’t give in anywhere. It makes the pressure exact and predictable, but it also means that the shaft doesn’t conform to the body—you control the angle completely with your hand.
• Temperature. Glass conducts heat and retains it. This is the prerequisite for temperature play, and it’s something silicone can’t handle in the same way because silicone insulates rather than conducts.
• Lube. The manufacturer states that the product is compatible with all types of lube. Silicone isn’t—silicone-based lube breaks down silicone surfaces over time.
• Fragility. This is the glass’s only real downside, and it’s absolute: a drop onto a hard surface can make the product unusable right away. A silicone dildo can withstand the same fall without a scratch.

The comparison becomes concrete against Fun Factory Limba Flex, a silicone dildo in the same size class. The manufacturer states that for size M it has a length of 18 centimeters, a diameter of 3.2 centimeters, and a weight of 169 grams, and describes the materials as body-safe, non-porous, and hypoallergenic. Limba Flex is thus similar in measurements but bendable, lighter, and more resistant to falls—while Drive Me Crazy is stiff, heavier, temperature-conducting, and compatible with every type of lube. It’s two different answers to the same question, not a better and a worse product.

Usage: two ends, grip, and lube

Without a motor and without programs, the usage is completely manual, and that means that the few pieces of information that are actually published weigh heavily. The manufacturer states an insertable length of 16.5 centimeters out of a total of 19.1, leaving 2.6 centimeters as grip. It’s short. What can be established is that the outer glass ball at the double-bead end is what provides the grip—it’s wider than the shaft and works as a stop against the hand.

The manufacturer recommends applying a little lube to both tips and the shaft before use, and states that it increases the feel. The reason is that glass has very low friction when it’s wet but high friction when it’s dry—unlike silicone, which glides reasonably well even without lube.

Which lubricant works with a glass dildo?

All of them. The manufacturer explicitly states that glass is compatible with all types of lube, and the same information is also in Pipedream's manual for their own glass series. One product description lists water- or silicone-based as a recommendation and, in its ongoing text, highlights silicone-based lube for the best glide.

It is the single biggest practical advantage of glass compared with silicone. On a silicone product, silicone-based lubricant is out of the question, because it breaks down the surface over time and makes it porous—and a porous surface can no longer be cleaned properly, only replaced. On glass, that limitation doesn’t apply. Silicone-based lubricant also lasts longer than water-based and doesn’t need to be topped up as often, which is a real difference in practice.

There is still one caveat. If you use a condom on the shaft—which is reasonable if it’s shared between people—you should stick to water-based lubricant, because oil-based products break down latex. The manufacturer states that the product contains no latex, but that doesn’t say anything about what you put on the outside of it.

Can Drive Me Crazy be used anally?

The retailer listings state that the shaft is suitable for both vaginal and anal penetration. The manufacturer’s own text describes the product as a glass dildo for internal and external stimulation without limiting the area of use, and the product description also states that the curved tip is intended for stimulating both the G-spot and the prostate.

What can be concluded purely from a construction standpoint is that the shaft lacks a clearly flared base plate of the kind that anal products normally have. The outer glass ball is wider than the shaft, but it’s a ball, not a flanged base. With 16.5 centimeters of insertable length and only 2.6 centimeters outside, the margin is small. Therefore, always keep a firm grip on the outer ball during anal use, and never let go of the shaft.

Grip, the bend, and why rigidity matters

The weak upward bend is the product’s functional core. On a flexible dildo, a bend like that is partially straightened by the body; on a rigid glass rod, it isn’t. The angle you get is exactly the angle shaped into the glass, and it only changes when you twist your hand.

That means two things in practice. The first is that the pressure becomes more precise than with a soft product—which is the whole argument for choosing a hard material. The second is that you bear full responsibility for the angle—there is no built-in give that absorbs misdirected pressure. The manufacturer’s own safety instruction is brief but clear: stop using the product if you experience irritation or discomfort, and do not use it on swollen or inflamed skin areas or on wounds.

Temperature play: how to heat and cool the shaft

Temperature play is the argument that comes up in every description of the product. The manufacturer states that Drive Me Crazy can be heated or cooled for sensory experiences, and the product listings repeat it. It’s a genuine property of the material: glass conducts heat and retains it for a couple of minutes, which neither silicone nor ABS plastic does to the same extent.

The problem is that none of the sources that apply specifically to this product state what temperature is allowed—how hot or how cold. The manufacturer writes that the shaft can be heated or cooled, full stop. No temperature limit, no method, no warning. Another description writes that the shaft can be heated in hot water or cooled in the freezer, but it also does not state any limit.

How do you heat a glass dildo safely?

Since no instructions are published in the listing, we use the written instructions that are available for the same material type from another manufacturer. Pipedream’s Swedish manual for the glass series Icicles states that the shaft should be submerged in warm water to heat it, and it explicitly warns against extreme temperature changes. That is the instruction that is reasonable to follow here as well.

Practically, that means a water bath with tap-warm water and waiting a few minutes—not boiling water and not a microwave. Always check the temperature against your wrist before using the shaft—glass feels cooler than it is when you hold it with dry hands, and a surface that feels comfortable in your palm can be too hot for the mucous membrane.

What absolutely should be avoided is going directly between the extremes. Borosilicate withstands temperature differences better than ordinary glass, but no glass type tolerates unlimited thermal shock—and since no limit is published for this product, there is no way to know where the limit lies. Always let the shaft return to room temperature between heating and cooling.

Chilling in the fridge—and why the freezer is a worse idea

Pipedream’s manual lists the fridge as the method for cooling a glass shaft. Another source mentions the freezer. The difference is not insignificant: the fridge provides around five degrees, the freezer can be as low as minus eighteen, and the latter involves both a greater temperature difference compared to the body and a risk of condensation freezing onto the surface.

The recommendation is therefore the fridge, ten to fifteen minutes, and wiping with a clean towel before use. It provides a clear temperature contrast without stressing the material and without risking discomfort to the mucous membrane.

Cleaning, water resistance, and storage

The manufacturer states the waterproof rating class as Submersible, meaning submersible, and other retailers all state that it is waterproof: yes. No IP rating is published according to IEC 60529, and it would also mean nothing here—an IP rating describes how well an enclosure protects electronics from water, and in this product there is neither an enclosure nor electronics. Solid glass has no openings, no seams, and nothing that can take in water.

Cleaning is therefore as simple as it can be: warm water and a mild, unperfumed soap or a cleaning product intended for intimate products, before and after each use. Pipedream’s manual for the glass series specifies warm water and an antibacterial cleaning agent both before and after, which is the routine we recommend here as well. Dry with a clean towel—glass doesn’t dry by itself and leaves limescale marks instead.

Tål Drive Me Crazy a dishwasher?

Here, the sources diverge. One source explicitly states that the shaft is safe to put in the dishwasher. None of the other shops mention a dishwasher, and the manufacturer’s own product text doesn’t either.

That means the claim is a shop claim with no coverage from the manufacturer. From a purely material-technical point of view, it’s not unreasonable—borosilicate glass is the material that lab glassware and oven dishes are made of, and it can withstand dishwasher temperatures—but there are two objections. The first is that a dishwasher involves rapid temperature changes, which is exactly what Pipedream warns about in its manual for the corresponding product. The second is that a glass rod that’s loose in a dishwasher rack can knock against dishes, and that is the only kind of damage the glass is actually sensitive to. Hand-washing in warm water is easier, faster, and completely sufficient.

Storage in the satin pouch that’s included

A satin pouch with the brand’s name is included in the delivery. The manufacturer lists it as the only accessory, and other retailers confirm that it comes with. On a glass product, the storage pouch isn’t a detail—it’s the only protective device the product has.

Pipedream’s manual for the glass series states that the rod should be stored cool and dry and separately from other objects. The advice applies very much here: glass against glass or glass against metal in the same drawer gives chips at the edges, and a chip on a glass rod isn’t a cosmetic issue—it’s the reason to discard it. Use the pouch, and put the pouch where it can’t fall.

Durability: the material’s only real weakness

A glass product has no battery that loses capacity, no motor that wears out, no charging cable to misplace, and no surface that ages. In practice, there’s only one way to destroy it: a blow or a drop onto a hard surface.

It’s not a theoretical problem. Among the six customer reviews that have been published for this exact item, one customer describes that the rod broke twice—the first time when it fell onto the floor, the second time when it rolled down from a bed. These are individual customers’ experiences and not a measurement, but it illustrates exactly the weakness that the material choice involves: this shape is round and rolls, and it doesn’t tolerate the drop.

Check the rod before every use

The routine takes five seconds and should not be skipped. Hold the wand against a light source and rotate it one full turn. Look for three things: a hairline crack in the glass, a splinter or a sharp edge, and a matte or cloudy area that was not there previously. If you find any of these, the product should be discarded—not repaired and not used “carefully.” A crack in glass grows, and it grows fastest under stress and temperature changes.

The inspection is especially important after the wand has been in the refrigerator or hot water, and after every time it has been dropped—even if it looks intact. Glass that has been hit can have internal stresses that don’t show until the material is stressed the next time.

The documentation that’s missing

When you compile what is actually published about Drive Me Crazy, the list of gaps is longer than you’d expect from a product that has been on the market since 2012. No product weight, no specified diameter from the manufacturer, no borosilicate quality, no maximum working temperature, no maximum permissible temperature difference, no user manual, and no published manufacturer warranty.

What does exist, on the other hand, is unambiguous and easy to check: measurements in three of four dimensions, material information, material declaration regarding latex and phthalates, what’s included in the delivery, and a safety instruction. For a product without electronics, it covers most of what matters—but the absence of weight and a written temperature guideline are two gaps that a manufacturer reasonably should have filled.

Drive Me Crazy compared with the alternatives

Two comparisons are relevant: with the best-selling glass toy range and with a silicone dildo in the same size class. All the information below comes from each respective manufacturer’s own specifications.

Against Pipedream Icicles No. 8 — two completely different formats

Pipedream Icicles No. 8 is effectively the same product as the Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand. In the specification, they are not the same.

Pipedream states that for Icicles No. 8 the material is Glass, the total length is 17.8 centimeters, and the width is 3.8 centimeters, and it describes the glass as hypoallergenic, non-porous, and body-safe. Drive Me Crazy is therefore 1.3 centimeters longer but slightly narrower—an 11.4-centimeter circumference corresponds to about a 3.6-centimeter diameter versus Icicles’ 3.8. The differences that actually matter are somewhere else.

The first is that Drive Me Crazy publishes an insertable length — 16.5 centimeters — while Pipedream does not state any insertable length at all for No. 8. The second is the format: Icicles No. 8 is single-sided with a wave profile and a bulb base, while Drive Me Crazy is double-sided with two different ends and six nubs. The third is the warranty, and here Pipedream wins: the manufacturer states a 90-day warranty on No. 8, while no warranty period is published at all for Drive Me Crazy. Ninety days are admittedly short, but zero is shorter.

The conclusion: if you want two shapes in the same product and a published insertable length, Drive Me Crazy is the choice. If you want a slightly thicker shaft from a manufacturer that actually states a warranty period, Icicles No. 8 is the choice. The material arguments are identical — both are non-porous glass.

Against Fun Factory Limba Flex M — glass against silicone in the same size

Fun Factory states that for Limba Flex in size M, the length is 18 centimeters, the diameter is 3.2 centimeters, and the weight is 169 grams, and it describes the materials as body-safe, non-porous, and hypoallergenic. The series is also available in S — 12 centimeters, Ø 3 centimeters, 111 grams — and in L, 18.1 centimeters, Ø 4.1 centimeters, 236 grams.

So the measurements are close to Drive Me Crazy: 18 versus 19.1 centimeters in length and 3.2 versus about 3.6 centimeters in thickness. What makes the difference is everything else. Limba Flex is flexible and keeps the shape you give it; Drive Me Crazy is rigid and gives the angle that is formed in the glass. Limba Flex weighs 169 grams and can be dropped; Drive Me Crazy publishes no weight and cannot be dropped. Limba Flex cannot be used with silicone-based lube; Drive Me Crazy can be used with all types. And Limba Flex provides no benefit for temperature play, because silicone insulates instead of conducting heat.

This is the most useful comparison to make before buying, because it’s about which material you want rather than which model. If you want flexibility, low weight, and durability against drops, you should buy silicone. If you want exact pressure, temperature play, and a material that won’t age, you should buy glass — and then Drive Me Crazy is one of the cheaper ways to get there.

One shop in this market sells it: SexToys.co.uk.

The item is sold in this market by SexToys.co.uk (EAN 5060108819718).

We only have shop data; we don’t have stock figures. Product data was gathered from four online shops.

A model that has been on the market since 2012 has had time to become a commodity item, where stores price against each other rather than against a recommended price. This is the opposite of the situation with new premium products, where the spread between the cheapest and the most expensive store is often fifty percent or more.

Two things are still worth checking at checkout. The first is the shipping cost, since it can affect the total price. The second is that prices can change since the time of the price check—always check the final price before you pay.

Who is Drive Me Crazy for—and who isn’t it for?

It’s for you if you want a non-porous material that doesn’t age and can be cleaned completely. It’s for you if you want to be able to use any kind of lubricant, including silicone-based. It’s for you if you’re curious about temperature play, because glass is the only material in the category that makes it meaningful. And it’s for you if you want two different shapes in the same product without having to buy two products—the simple club at one end and the double-ball at the other are genuinely different in design.

It’s not for you if you want something that’s yielding. The manufacturer lists the flexibility as Rigid, and the product description says it is not bendable, and if you prefer a soft product, that won’t suit you. It’s not for you if you need a product that can withstand being dropped—here, silicone is superior, and customer reviews already include examples of the opposite. It’s not for you if you want a flanged base for safe anal use, because the shaft ends in a ball and not in a plate. And it’s not for you if you want a completely documented specification, because neither weight, borosilicate quality, temperature limit, nor warranty period is published.

One more thing belongs in the decision. Drive Me Crazy is a product without electronics, which means there’s nothing that can stop working. That’s a real advantage over time: a vibrator in the same price range has a built-in lithium-ion battery that’s used up after a few hundred charging cycles, while this shaft is just as usable ten years from now as it is today—provided it hasn’t been dropped. So the question isn’t whether the product will hold up, but whether you’ll store it in a way that lets it keep doing that.

Warranty, warranty claims (reklamation), and right of withdrawal

The warranty question is the weakest point in the product’s documentation. No manufacturer warranty is published for Drive Me Crazy—either in the manufacturer’s own product data or at the shop that sells it in this market. It’s a clear difference from the competitor Pipedream, which states a 90-day warranty on its non-vibrating products, and an even clearer difference from electronic products in the category where warranty periods of five to fifteen years occur.

What does always apply, however, are your statutory rights, and they are stronger than most manufacturer warranties. In the EU and EEA, the seller is liable for defects that exist at delivery and appear within at least 2 years (the legal guarantee). An initial defect in the glass—a casting stress, an internal crack, a sharp edge—is such a defect. A case of it falling to the floor is not.

In the EU and EEA, consumers buying online generally have a 14-day right of withdrawal, starting when the goods are received. Under EU rules, sealed goods that are not suitable for return for health or hygiene reasons are exempt from the right of withdrawal once unsealed. The right to complain for defects applies regardless. In addition, the shop states a 365-day open purchase return period for an unopened package, which is a voluntary commitment from the shop and not something that follows from law.

Practical tip: save the receipt and check the wand against the light as soon as the package is opened, before it’s used. A glass defect discovered on the first day is a simple complaint. The same defect discovered after half a year is a discussion about whether the product was dropped, and that discussion is hard to win.